By setting goals, you can trigger new behaviors, keeps you in your lane, and helps you sustain momentum in life. But what if the way you’ve been setting goals in the past was doing more harm than good? Inside this article, I share how to set goals in a way that doesn’t involve chasing a dangling carrot but has you living with purpose and feeling fulfilled.
It’s because by setting goals, you can trigger new behaviors, keeps you in your lane, and helps you sustain momentum in life. And let’s face it – we are human, and we like to win. So by setting a tangible goal, we can hit it and feel like we are winning.
In the end, you can’t achieve what you don’t measure, and you can’t improve upon something that you don’t properly manage.
But what if the way you’ve been setting goals in the past was doing more harm than good? Maybe the goals you were setting before were based on what looked good on the outside.
Before we go to a new way to set goals that fulfill not frustrate, let’s sum up why three of the old traditional goal-setting techniques don’t work.
If you’ve read any personal development book or joined a direct sales company at one point or another – you’ll get taught to create SMART goals.
This method is when you write down goal statements in the first person (I have, I am…) as if they already came true, but in a lot more detail. Each element of the SMART framework works together to create a carefully planned, precise, and trackable goal.
The goals must be Specific, Measurable, Action-oriented, Relevant, and Time-bound. But with this method, you focus on the goal itself and not the many steps and processes it takes to get there.
“When you have zero experience in something, everything seems realistic and achievable.” Blaz Kos
Which couldn’t be more accurate? Until you are in the trenches doing the work, you never know the hundreds of tasks and things that have to go right to reach a goal.
When I was in my former direct sales company, and my teammates were looking to hit car volume, we’d forecast sales month over month. This looked great on paper but failed miserably in real life.
Without setting up a task list for the increase in sales dollars to happen, there was no way the teammate would hit those goals. And they didn’t.
Another goal-setting technique you’ve probably done a time or two is to create a vision board with pictures of all the THINGS you’d like to do or buy one day.
I always thought these were a bit cheesy. Grab a magazine and cut out things and words that would motivate you. I mean, yachts are nice but is sailing something you REALLY want? Or is it something society says you’re supposed to have to be and look successful?
I am all about manifestation, but I also don’t believe you can spend time visualizing a mansion, sports car, and pool boy that somehow the universe will grant you your wishes.
Often, rather than get out there and work toward their goals and visualize the steps needed to make a dream happen, people who create vision boards seem to be waiting for the universe to grant their wishes. Then get completed down and depressed when they don’t hit goals.
And don’t get me wrong – you can undoubtedly set big goals for yourself. But it’s crucial to identify short-term action steps you can start taking right now to reach them.
A 2011 study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology found that fantasizing about an idealized future decrease the likelihood that someone will expend energy trying to turn their fantasy into a reality.
When you put a picture of a Lamborghini on your vision board, your brain reacts as if you already have a Lamborghini. You’ll experience a relaxation response that reduces your energy and decreases your motivation. (source)
And lastly, another traditional goal-setting technique is to write down your long-term goals in a journal form. This is where you see yourself in 3, 5, 10, and even 20 years from now.
But let’s be honest, there are SO MANY unexpected crises that can happen in one month, let alone ten years. Many times those journal books become wishful thinking – because planning for more than a year out is pretty much impossible.
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So now that you are shaking your head in agreement that those styles of goal setting haven’t worked for you either – let me share a new goal-setting approach.
It’s time to set goals that fulfill not frustrate you. Build a thriving business with goals that excite and energize you, not let you down quarter after quarter.
It’s time to create CORE INNER GOALS and OUTER GOALS. We call these Goals With Purpose.
How to do this is to understand the difference between them and know what you truly want out of life… Not what others tell you to become or to have.
So let’s start with OUTER GOALS as these are the ones you’ll recognize easily.
If I was in a goal-setting call with you – and I asked you what goals you want to reach in Q2 of this year, you will most likely give me a sales or income amount. For example, you want to make six figures this year, so you’d tell me your Q2 goal is to have $25,000 in sales or income.
But what’s with the $100k goal? Does that sound like you have a successful business if you can say you make $100k?
Because most people will use that number as a benchmark for success. I’ve done it plenty of times myself.
Other outer goals could be purchasing a luxury car or carrying a high-end handbag, or reaching a title goal in your company.
These are goals that include anything that focuses on the appearance of success. But when you think about why you want that LV handbag – you may not have a good reason.
It’s possibly about the perception of what others will think of you carrying that handbag or driving that car rather than what you want out of life.
And then there are the CORE INNER GOALS. Now, these are what success in business means to me. Once I found out about this goal-setting technique a few years ago – I’ve thought about business so much differently. These are going to be the goals that fulfill you, rather than just bring outward success. They help you step into your lane and live with purpose and intention. These are going to be goals that you can constantly achieve. Core inner goals are about a flow state of mind and how you want to FEEL every single day in your business.
So in my personal experience, rather than saying, “I want to onboard 12 new 1:1 clients this quarter.” Instead, “I want to impact 12 women to step into their purpose and give them the confidence to start, strengthen, or scale their business.”
When I turn my goal into impacting women and less about the income I get from doing so – I can foster a remarkable life on the inside, rather than one that looks good on the outside but maybe unfulfilling.
Inside The Social Note Community, my partner Jenny Taylor and I recently released a 5-part video lesson and workbook for our paid members to set fulfilling goals. We believe when you dig into your unique purpose and vision, you can set goals that fulfill, not frustrate.
When your goals align with your purpose, how you want to feel, and the impact you want to create – you’ll be living with more freedom and with less competition and comparison.
If you’ve felt pressure to achieve outer goals to be liked, admired, or respected, we invite you to join our Social Note Community. For a limited time, membership is open for just $25/month with quarterly or annual plans at thesocialnotecommunity.com.
The Social Note is an online community portal and resource library for the business owner who wants to discover her voice, share her story, and develop her brand in a humble, confident, and impactful way.
Say goodbye to setting and achieving goals only to realize later they didn’t make you as happy as you expected. Wouldn’t you instead learn how to set goals in a way that didn’t involve chasing a dangling carrot but had you living with purpose and feeling fulfilled?
In the end, when you set your quarterly and annual goals, limit the number of OUTER goals you set and increase the number of CORE INNER GOALS you want to feel, then create task lists to help you reach each of them!
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I help women go from feeling stuck and stagnant to being in total control of building a confident, brand-focused online business.
I believe your life experiences and layers of pivots help define what you stand for and lead you to a life with purpose.
Using my signature Stay in Your Lane Roadmap, I help you generate high-quality leads and increase sales conversions by applying an automated simplistic sales process through consulting, courses, done-for-you solutions, and a membership community.
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