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Podcast Show Notes

If I’ve heard it once I’ve heard it 100x times…. “If I could just motivate my team I’d reach (my goal).”

This is usually heard on repeat in the direct sales industry when you’re trying to reach some sort of goal where you need more sales for the month in order to reach a volume or title goal. If you’ve ever tried to manage or motivate any sort of team before I know you’ve said it to.

And the most logical response to this I’ve heard until now is “you can’t motivate anyone” – you do your work and maybe you’ll inspire them to do more on their own.

But making someone do something isn’t going to motivate them. They have to want to do it themselves.

But WHAT IF there was a way to motivate a team member or colleague or even yourself anytime – anywhere. To motivate them to WANT to do more. To achieve more.

Stumbling upon Maslow

If wasn’t until I was doing some research for a topic we are going to be covering inside The Social Note Community that I ran across Abraham Maslow. To be honest I didn’t know who he was. Considering how much I love the idea of people living out their purpose, it’s a regret I never learned about him prior or maybe it was I never paid attention to college well.

And that could totally be the case.

None the less… Abraham Maslow said:

“Once we have food and shelter — but before we can seek self-actualization — we must feel safety, belonging, and mattering. Without these three essential keys a person cannot perform, innovate, be emotionally engaged, agree, or move forward.” – Abraham Maslow

And wow it got me thinking about the highs and lows of my past direct sales team and even my past history with sales. What motivated me – what didn’t – and why that was.

hierarchy of needs

You see, Abraham Harold Maslow was an American psychologist who was best known for creating Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, a theory of psychological health predicated on fulfilling innate human needs in priority, culminating in self-actualization.

And self-actualization – the highest level in his hierarchy referred to a person’s potential, self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth and peak experiences.

This sounds much like my passion to help women discover their influence to monetize their knowledge.

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a motivational theory in psychology comprising a five-tier model of human needs, often depicted as levels within a pyramid. With the top one being the self-actualization that I mentioned.

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lower-level needs

Maslow (in 1943) initially stated that individuals must satisfy lower level deficit needs before progressing on to meet higher level growth needs.

These four lower-level needs in order were: 

Two Basics Needs to be made up of:

  • Physiological on the bottom which is food, water, shelter, and warmth,
  • then above that is Safety – which is security, stability, freedom from fear.

Then above the two basic needs were the two psychological needs:

  • One was Belonging and Love which is intimate relationships and friends
  • and the other was Selt-Esteem and Mattering which is the feeling of accomplishment, recognition, and respect.

meeting the next set of needs

Maslow said that when a deficit need has been ‘more or less’ satisfied it will go away, and our activities become habitually directed towards meeting the next set of needs that we have yet to satisfy. These then become our salient needs. However, growth needs continue to be felt and may even become stronger once they have been engaged.

He said every person is capable and has the desire to move up the hierarchy toward a level of self-actualization – the level at the top. Unfortunately, progress is often disrupted by a failure to meet lower-level needs.

Life experiences, including divorce and loss of a job, may cause an individual to fluctuate between levels of the hierarchy.

Therefore, not everyone will move through the hierarchy in a uni-directional manner but may move back and forth between the different types of needs.

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reflecting on my own life

When I sat and really looked at this pyramid chart – it makes total sense in my own life…  especially this past year as I’ve stepped into my own self-actualization need.

Fortunately, my physiological needs have always been met… them comes safety, belonging and love and, self-esteem, and mattering.

For as long as I can remember since high school and the 17 years that followed I bounced up and down in the middle of this hierarchy. 

Filling Safety Need

Safety means we can take risks emotionally, intellectually, and physically in order to stretch and grow.

This means as long as I was feeling fear I couldn’t completely move out of this need. Yes, I had safety when it comes to health, wellbeing, and safety against injury – but I would hold myself back and not take many risks when it came down to life decisions of what college to go to, making new friends, and socially growing.

Belonging Need

When it comes to belonging – you need to have people in your corner. Yes family and friends are needed… but when it comes to growing my business I think about the close tribe of people I’ve surrounded myself with.

Some weren’t the right fit and some are still in my bubble.

When I was having my best years in my direct sales company was when our team was a very tight-knit group who were all going in the same direction to reach our goals. It was very powerful to be a part of.

Self-Esteem/Mattering Need

Eventually, we lost steam and stopped rowing but I think it was due to too many of us not being able to achieve goals we had set. When you stop being recognized, some will drop down in that hierarchy. 

Makes sense now when I look back at the last 5 years of that business before I sold it.

And even how far I’ve come outside of that initial direct sales business… when I started to fil that self-esteem/mattering need by doing other things like brand consulting and marketing for other people is when I was easily able to let that company go.

Mattering means each of us contributes individually in a unique way. We are valuable and are making a difference. We’re appreciated and publicly acknowledged.

When I stopped getting that need filled from my direct sales company – I did a lot of self-discovery to uncover what my own passions and interests were that I wasn’t fulfilling. That I needed to lean into.

And all of that up and down in the hierarchy has led where I am right now. 

[interact id=”5e84c1c1906aef0014d02264″ type=”quiz”]

What to listen to on your team

Next time you want to motivate yourself or someone else LISTEN to what they are saying.

  • Are they Talking about “us vs. them”? If so they crave BELONGING
  • Are they complaining as being the victim? Or Are they perpetually seeking recognition? If so they crave MATTERING

As a leader, you must identify whether it is safety, belonging, or mattering that is most important to the people in your life or on your team, and then do everything you can to satisfy that concealed, subconscious need.

When you can offer someone safety + belonging + mattering = you will gain their TRUST.

Why our membership fills these needs

After I learned about Maslow’s hierarchy it became clear why The Social Note Community is the perfect membership product to fill the last step called Expand Your Influence in my Stay in Your Lane Brand Method.

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Kick fear to the curb

This community helps female business builders fill that need for Safety by being able to identify fears that are holding them back. My co-founder Jenny Taylor and I believe…

The quicker you realize that fear is a liar, the faster you can identify where it lies in your daily actions, and the faster you can kick it to the curb.”

Emphasis on collaboration

The Social Note Community also puts a huge emphasis on collaboration and engagement. When you can feel secure inside a group you find a place where you Belong. When you belong you can drop us vs. them mentality and focus on staying in your own lane.

Everyone matters

We also want to intensify the notion that everyone Matters.

However, unique their skills and interests are when shared. They can make a difference in this world. Every member should feel appreciated and publicly acknowledged for their individual gifting.

When we can help fill these basic and phycological needs – we open up the opportunity for them to reach the self-actualization step.

Self-Actualization Need

In 1962, Maslow said the growth of Self-actualization refers to the need for personal growth and discovery that is present throughout a person’s life.

For Maslow, a person is always ‘becoming‘ and never remains static in these terms. In self-actualization, a person comes to find a meaning to life that is important to them.

As each individual is unique, the motivation for self-actualization leads people in different directions. For some people, self-actualization can be achieved by creating works of art or literature, for others through sport, in the classroom, or within a corporate setting.

It is important to note that self-actualization is a continual process of becoming rather than a perfect state one reaches of ‘happily ever after’.

Characteristics of self-actualizers

  • They perceive reality efficiently and can tolerate uncertainty;
  • Accept themselves and others for what they are;
  • Spontaneous in thought and action;
  • Problem-centered (not self-centered);
  • Unusual sense of humor;
  • Able to look at life objectively;
  • Highly creative;
  • Resistant to enculturation, but not purposely unconventional;
  • Concerned for the welfare of humanity;
  • Capable of deep appreciation of basic life-experience;
  • Establish deep satisfying interpersonal relationships with a few people;
  • Peak experiences;
  • Need for privacy;
  • Democratic attitudes;
  • Strong moral/ethical standards.

(as mentioned by

Behavior leading to self-actualization

  • Experiencing life like a child, with full absorption and concentration;
  • Trying new things instead of sticking to safe paths;
  • Listening to your own feelings in evaluating experiences instead of the voice of tradition, authority or the majority;
  • Avoiding pretense (‘game-playing’) and being honest;
  • Being prepared to be unpopular if your views do not coincide with those of the majority;
  • Taking responsibility and working hard;
  • Trying to identify your defenses and having the courage to give them up.

(as mentioned by

“It is not necessary to display all 15 characteristics to become self-actualized, and not only self-actualized people will display them.

Maslow did not equate self-actualization with perfection. Self-actualization merely involves achieving one’s potential. Thus, someone can be silly, wasteful, vain and impolite, and still self-actualize. Less than two percent of the population achieve self-actualization.” (as mentioned by

Have you been teetering inside the levels too?

Learning more and more about Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs really does make a ton of sense to me on motivation and I invite you to dig into a bit too if you feel you’ve been teetering inside the pyramid between the level of needs.


  • it’s fear that you are still holding onto?
  • you’ve never let go of a friend or family member once told you?
  • you’re craving a community to feel safe within?

Whatever it is – if you’re not to the self-actualization step yet you are craving something that’s stopping you from reaching it.

As we open membership doors tomorrow to The Social Note Community for only two weeks I invite you to take a look into what we are doing to help female business builders like yourself who are here on purpose for a purpose.

New Membership Community Launched

To learn more about all four steps including my new Social Note membership which is opening soon that covers step four in the method: Expand Your Influence. Head to

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The Social Note is an online membership community for the business owner who wants to discover her voice, share her story, and develop her brand in a humble, confident, and impactful way.

Along with my co-founder Jenny Taylor we are bringing Storytelling + Creative + Community together as no one has ever done before.

For over 20 combined years we’ve shown up in the online space as our authentic selves to build our respective businesses. We realize that building a business in this digital age can seem complicated. But we believe that when you put your story out into the world you attract the right people to your brand. The one thing that you have that nobody else has is your story.

When you dig into your brand you’ll find your voice is ready to be heard. Your story is ready to be told. You just need to give yourself permission to share it.

Learn more about The Social Note Community and my Stay in Your Lane Brand Method at 

The Social Note Community is for women (from all countries) who are fed up with the sales tactics being reinforced throughout the online industry today. Whether you are just getting started or been in business for years, this community is for women who are ready to use their unique gifting, story, and passions to grow their business. This community welcomes women from all industries: creatives, service-based, network marketing, bloggers, influencers, affiliate marketers, and others.


Other episodes you may enjoy is “EP 37: TWO WAYS TO LEVERAGE YOUR INFLUENCE



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